Developing confidence in players is one of the simplest ways to succeed as a coach. Confident players perform well. Scared players don't. Players at all levels need confidence. Screaming at players and sitting them on the bench are not great ways to develop confidence in youth players.
I have witnessed far too many coaches kill players' confidence. A player comes to a team and its coach as a little bundle of potential. They are the star of their AYSO team. They score load of goals, dribble people, have an attitude that nothing can stop them. They smile and you can tell they love playing soccer.
A player who came to a team this way, but consistently gets beaten down or consistently plays 10% of a game loses confidence and over time, becomes just a shadow of themselves. As parents we expect so much from our kids and push them harder to return to their former glory days. The child, typically a perfectionist, high performing individual starts to feel like they have lost it and that they are not good enough. The parents push them to try harder. The coach gets frustrated and tells them to focus and try harder. The player gets worse and worse until they can't possibly do anything right. Coaches and many parents then write the player off. They've lost it. They weren't that good after all.
All players should be playing nearly equal minutes (I will dedicate a whole blog to this soon). I am sure that most people will take issue with this, but think about it. You picked the players. You trained the players. Yet, you sit a handful of them the majority of games. You never start them and you beat them down and pull them out when they inevitably screw up. Who? Me? Nah? Really? Sadly, I watch this game in and game out, every season on nearly every team. The worst part is that often it is on teams that are losing a lot of games. Just play your players. Give them a chance. Try them in different positions. They might just surprise you.
You picked the kids. Play them. They aren't up to snuff? Train them better. You are the coach. Take responsibility. Develop them and make them better. At practice teach them what they need to know and encourage them. Positive coaching is key.
All players should be playing nearly equal minutes (I will dedicate a whole blog to this soon). I am sure that most people will take issue with this, but think about it. You picked the players. You trained the players. Yet, you sit a handful of them the majority of games. You never start them and you beat them down and pull them out when they inevitably screw up. Who? Me? Nah? Really? Sadly, I watch this game in and game out, every season on nearly every team. The worst part is that often it is on teams that are losing a lot of games. Just play your players. Give them a chance. Try them in different positions. They might just surprise you.
You picked the kids. Play them. They aren't up to snuff? Train them better. You are the coach. Take responsibility. Develop them and make them better. At practice teach them what they need to know and encourage them. Positive coaching is key.
Coaches and parents. We cannot beat kids down and cannot tolerate it. Especially in players under the age of 13. They need to feel like they can do anything and everything. They need to be free to make mistakes and learn from them. There is absolutely no reason whatsoever to belittle players at any level. At the younger ages it is unconscionable.
Forget for a second that it is just flat out wrong to beat down and belittle a child in your care.
As a practical matter, it is just poor coaching from a competitive standpoint. Teams with confident, well trained players perform at a high level than teams with a coach who beats the players down and yells at them constantly. For your own sake, coaches, learn to be positive. Learn to trust your players to be free and creative. To make mistakes and learn from them.
If you can't be positive, keep your mouth shut on the sidelines. Better yet, coach players who are sitting next to you or coach players off the ball.
Tell these kids good things they do. "Great shot. Keep shooting!" "Yes! I love it!" Yes - I know you want to tell him the shot should have been on frame. You want to groan and moan and say, "you need to turn your hips more and keep your head down"...or whatever. Don't. Make a mental note, or better yet, jot it down and work on it at practice. For now, just be positive.
If you really have to correct them, use the PIP method. Positive. Information. Positive.
Positive: Great job of striking the ball hard!
Information: Make sure you square your hips to the goal.
Positive: Keep up the good work! I love the effort!
Don't be a confidence killer. These kids are brimming with confidence when they come to you. All you really have to do is not mess it up.
Some resources on this subject:
One Sports Mom’s Success Story: Dealing with a Bully Coach
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/youth_sports_psychology_blog/?p=1505
Build Confidence and Paths to Success
http://www.insideyouthsports.org/2010/04/build-confidence-and-paths-to-success.html
Forget for a second that it is just flat out wrong to beat down and belittle a child in your care.
As a practical matter, it is just poor coaching from a competitive standpoint. Teams with confident, well trained players perform at a high level than teams with a coach who beats the players down and yells at them constantly. For your own sake, coaches, learn to be positive. Learn to trust your players to be free and creative. To make mistakes and learn from them.
If you can't be positive, keep your mouth shut on the sidelines. Better yet, coach players who are sitting next to you or coach players off the ball.
Tell these kids good things they do. "Great shot. Keep shooting!" "Yes! I love it!" Yes - I know you want to tell him the shot should have been on frame. You want to groan and moan and say, "you need to turn your hips more and keep your head down"...or whatever. Don't. Make a mental note, or better yet, jot it down and work on it at practice. For now, just be positive.
If you really have to correct them, use the PIP method. Positive. Information. Positive.
Positive: Great job of striking the ball hard!
Information: Make sure you square your hips to the goal.
Positive: Keep up the good work! I love the effort!
Don't be a confidence killer. These kids are brimming with confidence when they come to you. All you really have to do is not mess it up.
Some resources on this subject:
One Sports Mom’s Success Story: Dealing with a Bully Coach
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/youth_sports_psychology_blog/?p=1505
Six Things Parents Should Say to Their Player
http://www.soccercoachingnotes.com/coaching/mental/six-things-parents-should-say.htmlBuild Confidence and Paths to Success
http://www.insideyouthsports.org/2010/04/build-confidence-and-paths-to-success.html
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